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Friday, April 14, 2017

How to Overcome Low Self-Esteem

Written by: Raji Adeola Noheemot

There is no fast way to overcome low self-esteem. It is a process which requires time and effort as there are no iron-clad ways on how to overcome it. Here are simple proven ways to improve your self-esteem.

1. Accept Yourself:
The first step in making low esteem an issue of the past is embracing you, I mean accept the person you are, you have to come to terms with your struggle. You have to take a moment to think and make a decision.

After acceptance next is decision making. You have to decide whether you want to improve or if you are comfortable being that way. If you have made a decision to improve your self-esteem then act on it.

2. Intrinsic Motivation:
By intrinsic motivation, I mean self-motivation. I like to say that the way you view yourself goes a long way in determining your self-confidence. Sometimes our low self-esteem stems out of certain instances or unavoided situations in our lives.

It could stem out of growing up in a discouraging environment or it could be as a result of molestation. Whatever it is, take a time to really think about the real source of your problem.

Once identified, you have to face it, you have got to tell yourself something like: “I may not be able to choose the environment where I grew up, but it is all in the past now. I am responsible for my future”.

Low self-esteem may also stem out of an unchangeable physical flaw. You have got to face it. Take a moment to stand bare in front of a full-length mirror, accept what you see. Accept who you are.

3. Take Responsibilities for your actions:
You cannot keep playing the blame game. You have to take responsibility for your actions. You can’t keep on putting the blame on the one who molested you or on the environment you grew up or on the people who sowed seeds of discouragement into your life.
The more excuses you make, the more room you provide for yourself to wallow in low self-esteem.

4. Recognise what you are good at:
For most people, it’s not what they are that holds them back. It’s what they think they’re not.” – John C. Maxwell

Instead of focusing on your weakness, focus on your strengths. Quit focusing on what you are not and begin to focus on who you are and who you can become. There’s a story about a little peachick, who admired birds in the air when they flew in their formations and kept on wishing he could fly.

He one day asked his mum why he couldn’t fly and she replied and said: “we may not be able to fly but we are the most beautiful birds on the planet, our beauty speaks for itself – that’s what makes us unique”.
Same way, we are all unique in our own different ways. Pay attention to your areas of strength.

5. Have a confidence Creed:
Few things help a person the way encouragement does. We often encourage people around us but fail to realise that we need to encourage ourselves as well. Lack of encouragement can hinder a person from living a healthy, productive life.

Don’t wait for people to encourage you, encourage yourself. Boost your esteem. You could write out a note and place it at a spot you look at and read it to yourself on a daily basis. I call it the confidence creed.

It could be a note like this:

I am me (insert name).  There is no one with the same traits as me.
I am Unique, I am confident, I am smart, I am strong and I am beautiful (or handsome as the case maybe.)
I am full of potential; there is so much I can be.
What happened yesterday has happened (past), I cannot go back and change it but I choose to make today count (present).
I am loved and I am able to love. I am not perfect but I am striving for progress.

I have an excellent mind and I am BETTER!

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