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Friday, April 14, 2017

Behind Every Successful Woman is Herself

Written by: Racheal Sewuese Tarkaa


It was over 350 years that Catherine the great said; “I beg you take courage, the brave soul can mend even disaster.” Didiana Jones, just like any other woman grew up preparing herself for a husband. She had gone through all the training required of a housewife.

That is, cleaning the house, staring at her beauty in the mirror, preparing meals, feeding factiously and real children wherever they were found and many others.

When a husband eventually walked by, not like he just walked by even. Didiana had to do stuff to get his attention, to attract him. You know what ladies do, so she gets wooed (as expected) and then became the housewife she always wanted to be.

They got two kids, then the tribulation started coming.

The first, a boy got diagnosed with something – I don’t know – but they said he had “a hole in the heart”. They needed money for his surgery. The husband, a union president was a little concerned, or so it seemed.

All his worries were in the fight for the union to be heard by the government. Didiana was heartbroken. She cried all day and night, but the next day, the man would still go out to continue with the union struggle.
This happened for a while until the little boy died.

However, it was at this point that the husband returned home with the needed money for the (now deceased) child surgery. It was too late. Didiana had to leave him.
Didiana started making jewellery from little. It was not too long before she got noticed by big – time society persons. Once, a multi – billionaire made her a major supplier of beads jewellery for his daughter’s wedding.

Many others followed and then she too was at the top, having her office complex and living in a duplex. She only stayed with her mum and daughter and few relations of hers. She was domination, money and class conscious.

She hated her past and never wanted to go back there. She dispossessed herself in order to possess more of herself. She kept looking into the mirror, but no longer to make herself beautiful or look attractive for a man, but for herself and her ego and maybe her family as well.

For her, marriage was the insurance for the worst years of her life and so she decided to live her best life without going back. She made meals, not to give out or feed kids, but for her family and her health. She became her motivation, her inspiration, the one who worked for her own joy.

She alone pushed herself, sleeping and waking up to do more. She needed no husband, she was her own husband, and no other backbone could be needed. Behind her, was her!
We all look up to strong, independent women, but how do we become one ourselves?

It is easy to give into feelings of self-doubt and back down from challenges but that is certainly not what being a strong woman is all about. When we do the best we can, we never know what miracle is wrought in our life or in the life of another.

Any woman who understands the problems of running a home will be nearer to understanding the problems of running a country because she is like a tea bag, you never know how strong and capable she is until she gets into a hot water.

People think that at end of the day that a man is the only answer (to fulfilment) saying “a man got to do what a man got to do”, but mind you, a woman must do what he can’t. She is always different and as such, she is irreplaceable.

I am a woman; I must make unusual efforts to succeed. If I fail no one will say, “She doesn’t have what it takes”. They will say, “Women don’t have what it takes”.  So women wear not wishbones where their backbone ought to be by not accepting defeats but rather challenges.

A woman must challenge, she must not be awed by that which has been built up around her, and she must reverence that woman in her which struggles for expression. A woman is a full circle, within her is the power to create, nurture and transform.

What she needs is not a man to answer to fulfillments but courage. Courage is like a muscle, we strengthen it by use because it is the best protection and taking joy in living is her best cosmetic. Her courage gives her confidence to successful steps in life.

As Anais Nin rightly said, “Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage”.
Therefore, she must take a great deal of courage to stand up to enemies, but even more to stand up to her friends. Not all that glitters is gold. In other words, her success lies in her and no one else.

Whatever a woman wants, she can get it through courage, strength and determination to create, nurture and transform all because behind her success is herself.

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