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Monday, September 26, 2016

When Love becomes Foolishness

Written by: Love Doctor

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Love should not make you lose your sense of reasoning or value

Love is usually abused by people who don’t really understand what it’s all about. Love is not all about sex, partying, money and flashy gifts. Love has more meaning than what people usually mistake it for.

When the value of something is unknown, abuse is inevitable. People have wandered on the paths of the mystery LOVE, till they become so beclouded and perplexed by it and can no longer think of the right paths of life and then they act foolishly and end up in regrets.

Such people will always wish love never existed, but it was their fault because they never understood the concept behind the 4 lettered word “LOVE”. They think that once you start experiencing sexual urges and have fully developed bodies, then they must fall in love at all cost.

And again some people usually think love is a do or die affair!
When your relationship with the opposite sex becomes unhealthy, it calls for a sober reflection on how one is living his/her life.
Adults +18 and above of age, can fall in love, but they should be able to define their relationship as early as possible. Sex should only be approved once they are legally married.

Below is a story by Miss Joy.

He dumped me after I sacrificed everything and slept around for his sake.

Dear Love Doctor,

Please, I need advice, because I feel like committing murder.
I met this guy when I was in higher institution of learning. We started dating from our first year because we were on the same level. By our second year in school, things became so difficult for his family that he had to drop out of school but I stopped him because I had to use my pocket money and the little I could gather to pay his fee for the first semester of our second year.

That same month, I met an elderly man who wanted me for a relationship and he promised to take care of me (sugar daddy). I told my boyfriend about it and promised to always use whatever I got from the man to pay his fee and buy whatever was needed for his academic success.

This continued till we graduated. On our convocation day, he promised to use his first salary to get me a gold chain. But after we left school, he started acting funny and eventually broke up with me. His excuse was that I was sleeping around with older men and my blood is now dirty and contaminated.

Recently, I called him and reminded him of his promise that he should at least fulfill his promise but he only laughed at me and gave me the insult of my life. Please, I need advice because I am planning to commit murder. Not on myself but on him.

Love Doctors Advice
Dear Joy, 
I feel your pain, but such is life. In the first instance, you no business falling so deeply in love with him or paying his school fee, because your parents sent you to school to read so that you can graduate and become somebody in life, not to pay someone else’s school fee or to get too emotionally attached to somebody.

You misplaced your priority and got too deeply emotionally involved with a boy instead of focusing on the primary reason you were sent to school.

You ought to have maintained some distance especially over matters of the heart, instead of allowing yourself to get entangled in the family problems of a boy that you never knew from the beginning. You didn’t have to bear such a debilitating body, because the boy had other avenues apart from you to raise money.

That boy was just being lazy and cheap by depending on you – a poor girl – when he could have run around his relatives or done some work to make money and pay his school fee. Do you know that there are many students who work to pay their way through school?  

Your boyfriend chose to take the easy way out by heaping all his family problems on you, instead of struggling like a man to pay his way through school. He apparently took advantage of your naivety and your deeply sentimental nature to get money from you.

Love is a sacrifice and you have sacrificed everything for him. He used you, because he knew that you loved him too deeply. That’s why he succeeded in getting you to become a whore for him “out of love and pity”.

You went too far by prostituting or sleeping around with sugar daddies in order to “gather money” to help your boyfriend. You should know that even when you’re in love, there is a legal or moral limit to what you can do for love. For example, it is wrong to commit murder or kill an innocent person just because you love your man.

Therefore, you acted wrongly and unreasonably by disregarding your moral background/upbringing to sleep around or become a whore out of love for your man. Love shouldn’t make you lose your sense of reasoning or values. You shouldn’t have slept around for his sake.

You don’t need to commit murder. It isn’t worth it. Simply let go and put the ugly experience behind you, because not all relationships lead to marriage. Such relationships only happen to teach lessons and then we move on with our lives and become better people.

Forget the relationship but don’t forget the lesson. God is watching all of us, and He will judge us according to our works. Put your trust in God, because the wicked will not go unpunished.

True love will not pass you by. Your Mr. Right will still come to you. That boy only left you so that you can find the right person for you – someone better than him.

Finally, never depend on the promises people make, because they seldom fulfill them. That boy broke his promise to you, so that God would make you find the perfect person. Good luck and God bless.

Let’s all wear our Thinking Cap.

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